Joy,  Personal Development

When Happy People Collide with the Real World

Happy Ostrich in the Sand Syndrome

If I’m bee-bopping down the highway with my tunes blaring and a cup of hot coffee in my console, don’t disturb my groove. Or my mood for that matter. I’ve made a conscious decision to put myself in a state of joy. I only recently learned no one cares about my troubles.

Are you really laughing at me right now? This piece of information was such a blow to my ego. No one holds me in high-esteem for having the suckiest life.

Y’all, I’m kidding. I learned this fact a long time ago.

It’s an Attitude

Yeah, yeah you’ve heard it before.

“Your attitude determines your altitude.” -Zig Ziglar

“Whatever your mind can believe and conceive it can achieve.” -Napolian Hill

“You need a check-up from the neck up to avoid stinkin’ thinkin’.” -Zig Ziglar

Did you just throw up a little in your mouth? I hate to break it to you, but this is the secret happy people have adopted. We have intentionally created a mindset to be positive. We learned at some point in our life that we feel better and have better interactions with others if we start with our own kind of happy. (Insert visual of finger looping around your ear…)

Granted, there are varying degrees of happy but it is the same principal. You cannot escape tragedy, evil, heartbreak, disappointments, or sadness in this life, however, the way you process these facts of life will determine your level of peace of mind. I also realize there is a difference between happiness and joy.

Happiness is a state of mind, where joy is a state of being.

I can choose sadness or I can choose to be happy, but I can’t choose both.

The happy people have learned to find joy in the little things. There is a centering force we have adopted that allows us to operate in a state of purpose and confidence. Joy is lasting, where happiness is always looking for the next hit. Joy is a level of contentment that says, “Things may not be optimal in my life right now, but I know who I am, I know what I want, and I know Whom I serve. Every day is a new beginning.”

Joy is the guiding force in your life and is connected to love. It is true that love makes the world go ’round. The connection to love is what anchors us all from a state of misery to a state of joy. When you love yourself it takes on a whole new mental shift.

Shine by Design was founded on the principle that it is my right and my obligation to be a light in this dark world. With the right design and connection of the mind, body, and spirit, I will treat myself with the same respect I treat others. I will say kind things to myself the way I say kind things to others. I will find a way to shine even when the “real world” is throwing me under the bus. When I focus on living in a state of joy, I am a better Christian, wife, mother, daughter, and friend. I completely shifted my attitude when I started putting a major emphasis on growing my inner awareness.

How did I grow my inner awareness to elevate my attitude?

You can raise your energy to attract positivity

I decided to only attract positive things and people. I used to commiserate with family and friends about the “woe is me” overwhelm of life. It’s not that I wanted everyone to feel sorry for me, it’s just what everyone seemed to talk about. We all try to one-up the story of the other of who’s busier and has more demands. Almost to the point, we want a badge of honor saying, “I  win! I have the craziest life of all of us. Congratulations!”.  No prize money is awarded.

The more you air your crazy, the more the crazy finds you. Your vibration is so chaotic that people feel stressed just being around you. There are circumstances to sharing your life with others. There can be bonding moments where you are helping another feel like they are not alone, but good grief, don’t treat it like a contest.

Make the World Go Away

Set your intention to say positive things and positive comments. My favorite diffuser of a potentially negative conversation starts with the very first words out of my mouth. When someone asks the simple innocent question, “How are you?”, my first response is, “FANTASTIC!”. Not in a looney, maniacal way, but with genuine enthusiasm. It’s like I dare the person to dump any negativity into my space. Most of the time they are so surprised that when I ask them in return they say, “I’m good!”

You have to understand I see a lot of different people every day. I am never in the same daily office environment. I don’t have the time or energy to unload any inkling of trouble to the people I meet. My inner circle knows my struggles, but the bulk of my contacts don’t have a clue. That is by design. I raise my vibration to happy and positivity right out of the gate.

I only input positive information into my mind

You’d better believe this is by design. My family has stopped watching the news or talk shows of the latest gossip or world showcase problems. That’s being naive you say? Trust me, if it’s bad enough I will hear about it from the interactions of the day. We are very visual by nature. When you see the event plus hear the event, it makes a greater imprint on your mind. What you allow into your mind will stay there for good. It then becomes a decision to pile on more of the same or dilute it with something positive.

It just takes a drop to taint the whole cup.

A pure glass of water will change with one single drop of food coloring. One single drop. In a real sense, every intake of information is either coloring our mind with the good or with the bad. From my choice of music, what I watch, the books I read, and what I listen to in my valuable commute time all affect the tainting or purification of my mental state. I am not an ostrich burying my head in the sand. I have put a gatekeeper with a padlock stationed in my mind.

What is an area that you can raise your vibration? Where do you need to clear your mind to only accept positive energy and an abundance mindset? Share in the comments below how you create your shine day after day! This should make you smile!

Life is too exciting to live in black and white! Live life in color!

Shine Bright,



  • Tracy Holscher

    Yes!! Thank you for writing this! Thank you for also guiding appropriate responses to those people who think we “bury our heads in the sand”.
    I also love the part about loving yourself like you love others. I needed to hear that.
    I like to shine bright by loving people like Jesus and intentionally making someone’s day!

  • Cindy Skinner

    Good read, Anne! Love the part about joy… it is so true. Folks seek happiness when it is but a fleeting moment. When we live with JOY … it is like our aura… who we are… how we think on a daily basis. Thanks for sharing!

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