Balance Myth,  Personal Development

How to be Busy with Grace

Busy people get things done

The challenge becomes, do you get things done with grace, or with grumbling? Oh, friend, I am a reformed grumbler. No, I am a grumbler and I have to determine my mindset continually. Not once a day, but every moment it seems. To the outside world, it appears busy people have Super Powers of strength and swift efficiency with tasks and schedules.

In reality, I never learned the skill of saying “no”. I would be a hot mess if I continued my current trajectory.

No such thing as Time-Management

“Everyone wants a piece of me.” Learn the art of saying “no.”

“Wait, Anne. There is no such thing as balance or time-management?!”

In my last blog, I introduced you to the myth of balance. If you haven’t read “Are You Living in a Circus or a Symphony?” I consider that a prerequisite to this. There is no balance when it comes to work and home. There is no “time-management,” only self-management. How can you be happy and full of grace when you have so many things to accomplish?

I created a calm in my chaos by adopting an attitude of joy and grace in my busy life. I’m not perfect, not by any stretch of the imagination, yet I have learned to develop key components in my life to calm the crazy.

Here are a few suggestions to implement into your daily hectic routine:

  1. Keep a planner either physical or on your phone. Write out the day, the night before, to calm the monkeys in your head during precious sleep hours.
  2. You determine your schedule. Do you overestimate what you can accomplish in a day? Buffer your appointments with at least 15 minutes prior to and immediately following. I pad doctor’s visits with an extra hour after the expected one hour slot.
  3. Allow for “me time”. Do you block off an hour for lunch or early morning office work? What is needed during your day to feel calm? When you are able to take a moment to breathe, you give yourself permission to regroup. The constant push to the next meeting or activity breeds overwhelm.
  4. Stop telling people how busy you are. Newsflash, we are all busy. You are creating a state of stress, lack, and struggle when you verbalize your “I’m so busy” to the world. Instead, say, “I’m in a space of great momentum. I’m in my season of growth and change!”

The key is this: It’s up to you to use words, scheduling strategies, and boundaries to create your daily flow. 

 

It was a hard lesson for me to realize no one created my crazy but me. No one mysteriously kept saying yes to activities and appointments but me. I was creating my own crazy by allowing everything into my schedule.

With practice, you too will be able to navigate your hectic schedule with finesse. Do you love that word finesse? It conjures up an executive with poise and confidence. That’s what I desire!

I used to commiserate with family and friends about the “woe is me” overwhelm of life. It’s not that I wanted everyone to feel sorry for me, it’s just what everyone seemed to talk about. We all try to one-up the story of the other of who’s busier and has more demands. Almost to the point, we want a badge of honor saying, “I  win! I have the craziest life of all of us. Congratulations!”.  No prize money is awarded.

The more you air your crazy, the more the crazy finds you. Your vibration (energy frequency) is so chaotic that people feel stressed just being around you. There are circumstances to sharing your life with others. There can be bonding moments where you are helping another feel like they are not alone, but good grief, don’t treat it like a contest.

Set your intention to say positive things and positive comments. My favorite diffuser of a potentially negative conversation starts with the very first words out of my mouth. When someone asks the simple innocent question, “How are you?”, my first response is, “FANTASTIC!” Not in a looney, maniacal way, but with genuine enthusiasm. It’s like I dare the person to dump any negativity into my space. Most of the time they are so surprised that when I ask them in return they say, “I’m good!”

In the not too distant past, my response was, “I’m so busy! I feel like this will never end.” Dow.Ner. What is their response supposed to be?

Reframe Your Response

Your intention for the week is to determine your response when asked, “How are you doing?”

Remember, what you speak out loud is a reflection of the self-talk in your head. Instead of listening to yourself, talk to yourself. Reframe your conversation to include gratitude and permission to leave blank space in your calendar. We were not designed to go full force every waking moment.

Next week I’ll discuss “The Art of Saying, No.” Are you a people-pleaser? Then this will be a good refresher on setting boundaries. Friend, you are the designer of your schedule, do not give that power away. You were created to shine!

Shine Bright and Shine Often – Anne

 

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